Second weddings

Here are some tips on how to plan a first-class wedding, the second time around.

• Many “second timers” opt for simple dinner parties or cocktail receptions over full-blown affairs.
• If you have children, consider making them a special part of your wedding. Depending on their age, they may be a flower girl, ring bearer, junior bridesmaid or groomsman, or even the best man or maid of honor. Singing during the ceremony, lighting a unity candle or just incorporating a reading will also tie the family and the ceremony together in a special way. It can be a very emotional and confusing time for a child so make sure that they are comfortable with their role.
• The good news? Wearing white is no longer taboo. Wear whatever color feels and looks good on you. If you’ve already had the “princess in white gown” moment, consider a tea-length cocktail dress, an evening dress, or a beautiful suit.
• Down the aisle: Consider an escort such as your kids or stepkids or someone else who is meaningful to you. Or why not you and your groom walk down together?
• The wedding invitations are issued from the bride and groom, in third person, without titles if it is a second time wedding. It would read as follows: Renee Jones and John Smith request the honor of your presence at their marriage.
• Who pays? For the second wedding, typically the bride and groom split the costs evenly. Don’t expect parents or relatives to chip in. Of course, if they offer, you may accept their help graciously.
• It’s completely appropriate to register for gifts. Since many second-timers come from established homes, gift registries are even more important so that guests are able to purchase something the couple truly desires.